“Don’t think that there’s a different, better child ‘hiding’ behind the autism. This is your child. Love the child in front of you. Encourage his strengths, celebrate his quirks, and improve his weaknesses, the way you would with any child. You may have to work harder on some of this, but that’s the goal.” – Claire Scovell LaZebnik
This is Abdul’s story, told by his mother, Aisha.
Abdul was carried full term with no complications; between the ages of 4 and 5 months, he was sitting independently; at 7 months, he was crawling; and by 10 months, he was already walking. Everything looked and seemed so normal till Abdul started school by the time he was a year old.
When every child in Abdul’s class was attempting to say words and turning towards the sound of their names, Abdul wasn’t saying anything; he was just making unintelligible sounds; he couldn’t even say Mama. Then I started to worry. I shared my concerns with his teacher and she recommended that I see the doctor who evaluated her daughter at the Jahmale Clinic here in Liberia.
On the day of the appointment, the doctor asked a series of questions, and I responded as best as I could. She then suggested that we see Dr. Marbell, a certified neuro-paediatrician, in Ghana. She gave us the contact details and sent a copy of Abdul’s evaluation report to Dr. Marbell at Mission Paediatrics.
Although we planned the trip for March 2020, COVID and the lockdown rules changed a lot of things for us. We were finally able to make it to Ghana in October 2020 to see Dr. Marbell. She had us run some tests in addition to the evaluation of Abdul. All Abdul’s tests came out clean.
I’m NEVER gonna forget the day we were given Abdul’s diagnosis. I thought the whole world was against me. I knew nothing about autism, but Dr. Marbell was really helpful; she encouraged us and gave us hope. “Look, autism is not a disability,” she said. “It’s just a diagnosis and your child is just 2 years and 11 months old. Once you start therapy now, before he turns 18 or 20, you’ll see he’ll be very okay.”
Dr. Marbell introduced us to ENNY Foundation; after we spoke to Mr. Emmanuel Nyarko, we came to Ghana and finally met with him on Monday, December 14th, 2020. He was very helpful. Most often, we don’t expect people to go the extra mile, i.e., beyond the services paid for. When we concluded that I would stay in Ghana for Abdul’s therapy, Mr. Nyarko helped us get a place and helped us with everything else we needed to make our stay comfortable.
Before the therapy, he had no language, communication, and social or play skills. Abdul was only making noise, “aaaaaaaaaaa…” and when his teacher in Liberia was teaching him to say Mama, he would say, “mamamamama…” Sometimes, he pointed to things he needed, especially his food.
During the therapy, Abdul began to improve not only in his language, communication, and social skills but also in his behaviour. He became more responsible and acted more matured. For instance, he could just wake up and start screaming for no reason, but all that stopped during therapy.
Abdul’s intense therapy lasted for 6 months in Ghana before we returned to Liberia. Kofi, one of the facilitators, joined us to support Abdul and help him transition to school. Today, Abdul’s teachers marvel at how intelligent and smart he is. To be honest, I am only able to help Abdul with his reading and vocabulary on Wednesdays, the only days we get home early.
Today, Abdul is able to make sentences, like “Mama, go outside” when he wants to go outside. I sit back and reminisce, and I am really grateful for how far he has come. Sometimes, I tell the people around me, “Last year by this time, Abdul wasn’t doing this or that; he couldn’t even say this or that.”
My advice to parents is that, when you get your child’s diagnosis, DO NOT LIVE IN DENIAL. The fact that your child is autistic does not mean that he won’t become that engineer, lawyer, doctor, or whatever you dream of for them. The only way your child won’t be all of that is if you refuse to accept the diagnosis and seek early intervention. Don’t wait till it’s too late. God never presents us with problems or issues we cannot handle.
With lots of emotions, I want to thank God first and say a very big thank you to Mr. Emmanuel Nyarko and his entire foundation for helping Abdul get to where he is today. At age four, he’s reading and writing well and doing very well in school even though he’s autistic. As I sit here now, I am watching a video of an autistic adult who is just learning to read and write…I realised how blessed I am.
